Mother's Day 2013

Mother's Day was good. Phil made us all breakfast, we had honey yogurt parfaits with strawberries and popovers.

We dressed in our Sunday best and per tradition and my insistence we took a picture before church.
Only one head was swapped here...



Kate was too shy to go up and sing in sacrament meeting, Max was being disciplined in the hall and Rhett was giving me a run for my money. So the first hour of church wasn't the most peaceful. But typical!

The kids made cute handouts in Primary and Nursery. Max and Kate were pretty hell-bent on eating "their" candy. Part of me wanted to be selfish and tell them that it was really MY candy but that just seemed petty. They ate it. :)



Last Wednesday after work the kids gave me cards that they made with our fabulous babysitter Kara. She is the best, so thoughtful and we all love her. Thank you Kara for thinking of me. The kids were so proud and gave them to me as soon as I walked in the door, they couldn't wait until Sunday.



I napped, Phil left us all sleeping to go and study at his parent's empty house. We woke, I made dinner and life resumed as normal.

I am grateful to be a mother but know that it isn't children that give you a mother heart. My life experience has made me more aware that this day isn't or shouldn't be about celebrating just motherhood per se but rather womanhood. Motherhood is glorious and wonderful and hard and and and... BUT it isn't necessarily children that bestow the title. It is loving, serving, tending and giving. And anyone can choose to give such things to those they love and interact with. Off my soapbox now. Happy Mother's Day to all woman!

10 on 10: May 2013

One photo, every hour, for 10 hours

We wake, sippy cups of warm milk and PBS kids for them, and a protein shake for me.

Rhett has been sleeping in a bit lately. He usually hollers out "Mom! Mom! Mom!" or dad, depends on the day. You go into his room and pluck him from bed, the blankies, two of them, must accompany him. He will then rest his sweet sleepy head on your shoulder briefly. Take advantage of this and snuggle and kiss as much as you can in the time allotted.

Man, the stark quality of my iPhone pictures and my dslr camera is always staggering...

We enjoy the last of the cool weather and have a snack on the back porch.

Finally dressed and ready for our day. I am not always so put together but today we are meeting Julie, Owen and Graham at the children's museum in Mesa. They move in 2 weeks to Utah for the last year of medical school and I don't want to talk about it. So sad to have friends leave.

 

We arrive at the museum just as it opens and I am mad/sad that there are 2 school buses already there. Darn those field trips! Despite the craziness and mass quantity of children we have a good time with our friends. 

 

We stay until the last possible moment, an hour past our usual naptime. The museum's hours are not conducive to our nap schedules and Rhett didn't stand a chance of making it home awake. Thankfully he transfers well and he continued to sleep another 2.5 hours.

 

We all napped...

Finally I peel my tired bones out of bed and prep the post nap milk. Not an exciting picture but I am sure I will want to remember this little ritual.

 

I am making yogurt and it is finally down to temperature where I need to add in the starter. 

 

More snuggles, I love sleepy babies.

We kill time on the computer doing "letters" aka starfall.com.

 

Swim goggles are the latest accessory.

 

Phil gets home from work, we eat a simple meal, burritos. It always ends up that I am cooking everyone else's meal and tending to water requests, etc. They finish dinner before I even get a chance to sit down most days and eat my own. Phil takes the kids and does more starfall with them. I eat my meal in peace and then tackle the dinner mess.

We are starting a new weekend night tradition, movie night! I thought it would be fun to let the kids pick a treat at the store. It was crazy in the candy aisle! They are too easily distracted by all the choices and Rhett just kept loading bags of whatever he wanted into the basket. We compromised, picked up a bag of sour gummy worms and a bag of jelly beans.

We popped some popcorn and doled out a few treats. Movie of the night was The Lorax. Cute movie but holy propaganda! I certainly understand and can support the views of the film but it was so thick. Phil kept making remarks and I kept shushing him. The kids liked it and it was over their heads anyway.

After the movie, teeth were brushed and we scampered off to bed. Another good day.

Beat Down

This blog sits in the back of my mind all the time. Niggling and waiting. Waiting, waiting! I sit down to write and it just takes so much darn time. Editing pictures, resizing for the web, uploading to photobucket, writing... But I want to do it. I like to look back on our family happenings and this is really the only journal I keep. So I will keep trying.

I am running out of time or rather I need to manage my time more wisely. But honestly just the three kids, being a wife, running the house and my working a few times a week is all I can manage. Did you know that three toddlers are energy stealers? Truth. I get them down for bed and then look at the aftermath of the day's work/play and I just want to turn off the lights and go to bed myself. But alas, I have no magic fairies or Mary Poppin's powers. Someone's gotta do it and that someone is me. So blogging gets pushed down down down on the list but in my heart I still love you ol' blog. Just be patient with me...

Happy Birthday Camden: 7 Years

Wednesday was Camden's birthday, he would have been 7.

The night before his birthday I was folding laundry and for some reason I just started crying. I was thinking about him and how we should have a 7 year old tucked into bed, how I should be folding his clothes next to the other kids' piles. I was just sad. My heart was heavy and I was down. I worked the next day and my melancholy followed me to work that morning.



Friday morning I made a cake so we could sing "Happy Birthday" with the kids and start to lay the ground work of telling them about their brother. We gathered around the cake after dinner and I told the kids that we were having cake for baby Camden's birthday. We were going to start singing and Kate said "Where is he?". Break my heart! I took her hand and we walked down the hall to his baby picture. I told Max and Kate that baby Camden had gotten sick and he died, that he now lives with Jesus but that he is still our big brother and that we love him. That appeased them and we went back and sang the song and ate cake.

Last night we went to the cemetery to clean his grave and leave flowers. Our friends and neighbors the Whittaker's joined us and we had a lovely evening walking around the cemetery, looking at headstones and wondering about the history of each person.

 

Grief is a funny thing. It evolves and it does lessen it's daily grip. Nowadays I am not continually thinking of or mourning Camden. It is now little bursts that crop up when I realize milestones that we should be having with him, or when Phil and I muse over our little family and he is missing. And of course on his birthday is when I feel it the most. The tears come and the sadness envelopes me for the day.

I am sure it will always be this way.
 

Driving home and again when we were tucking in Kate, we were asking her about her evening, recapping the night. When we got to Camden, she said she couldn't find him. I know she doesn't fully understand but I am happy that we are talking about him. I would rather teach my children about the Plan of Salvation any other way, but we have a personal testimony of the blessings of the gospel, the blessings of the temple and a sure understanding that we will see Camden again. He is ours forever.

And then Daddy came home.

Phil was in Fresno, California for six terribly long weeks. After our weekend trip together he was beyond itching to get home, he missed the kids and just wanted to be HOME. Home to his wife, home to his children, home to his bed, home to warm meals, home to the comfortable and familiar. Home.

He left as soon as he could Friday afternoon (April 5th) after checking out of the hospital, finishing up his patient notes, turning in his keys, etc. I didn't want him kill himself getting out the door in time which would mean a late night driving but he was determined. He pushed through the long 10 hour drive, drove too fast actually (speeding ticket!), and made it home at midnight. 

The next morning when Max and Kate came into our room he hid under the covers a bit and I asked Max to go on Phil's side of the bed to "get my pillow". Max complied and was thrilled to discover our late night traveler. The kids immediately hopped into bed and loved on their dad. I love their faces here, they say everything.

When Rhett awoke Phil went and got him out of bed. He was also very happy to see his daddy and they snuggled up while Rhett drank his morning milk.

To celebrate our daddy's homecoming we walked across the street to Bashas' bakery and let the kids pick out donuts. We threw in some orange juice, bananas and yogurt to try and balance things out but the donuts won. The kids loved it! It was fun to be together and do something special. We determined that donuts with daddy will become a monthly date.

As we were eating our meal there was the cutest elderly couple there enjoying some coffee and the morning news. On their way out they stopped at our table and complimented us on our beautiful family. It was just a lovely moment and I am so glad we have one another and were able to enjoy our time together. 

10 on 10: April 2013

One photo, every hour, for 10 hours, on the 10th day of the month.

I worked on the 10th and taking a photo every hour would be seriously redundant, I took a few shots at work and then a few at home in the evening. I certainly didn't make the required hourly photo but it is an accurate capture of my day.

I am lucky to work close to home and my "commute" is all of 7 minutes. I enjoy my job and the people I work with. Bonus points for being able to return to this office after having Max and Kate and moving across the Valley for a few years. 

My first patient of the day is at 7 o'clock and the rest of the day follows in similar fashion: update medical history, take necessary radiographs, review and address patient needs, scale, polish, floss. Repeat 9 times.

Lunch is at 1pm but I finished early and was able to run an errand at Target and briefly peruse the spring offerings. Target is the devil, always tempting me. 

I finish work at 5 pm, return home, get the update from our fabulous babysitter Kara and then unwind a bit with the kids. Here they followed me into my room where I changed my work clothes and relaxed on the bed a bit. 

They are crazy.

A quiet capture with my girl. We have our struggles together but when I remember to slow down and love her she responds in kind.

 

We eat dinner, leftovers since I worked, and then head outside to burn off the rest of the day. It is a really nice night, cool in fact. The kids ride their cars, Phil edges the front and back yard and I visit with Kendra. 

We have a good life and we are continually reminded of that. We are enjoying our home, neighbors and friends. It is especially nice when Phil is home with us and when he isn't stressed about looming exams/pressures of school. I think it is more poignant now when we know that so much change is on the horizon

 

It gets dark, we all head inside and the kids get a quick wash down and then we do the usual jammies and bed routine. I love those squishy buns.

Yosemite National Park

We spent Friday hiking around in Yosemite National Park. We stayed on the outer edges and know that we didn't get to fully appreciate it but due to time and my lack of proper hiking attire we stayed to easier trails and saw some highlights. The weather was gorgeous, perfect really for being outside and the park wasn't terribly busy but there were still plenty of people out.

We stopped in the Mariposa Groves and did a short 1.5 mile hike. I love pine trees. It didn't smell "piney" though. I also loved to see these clusters of baby trees, so fresh and green.




These giant sequoias are stupendous. We only had our phones on us and one of these days we will go back with our dslr camera and an appropriate lens to more fully capture their majestic beauty.

The California Tunnel tree was cut in 1895 to allow coaches to pass through it (and as a marketing scheme to attract visitors to the grove), this is the only living tree with a tunnel in it since the fall of the Wawona Tunnel Tree in 1969.

The Grizzly Giant (photo taken from wikipedia)

I love this next image. So breathtakingly beautiful! What a glorious world we live in.

Bridalveil Fall

On the way back from our hike in Mariposa Groves we gathered huge pine cones. I mean HUGE! We each had an armful and it got quite painful at the end due to maintaining a static and contracted position with our arms/shoulders/back. What possessed us? I have no idea. It seemed like a great idea at the time and we now have a trunk full of sap laden pine cones.

We picture swapped with a lady and this was the result of our turn. It has grown on me and I rather like it.

After spending the day in Yosemite we headed back to our chalet, ate dinner and then went on a walk near the lake. We had such a good time just relaxing, talking and being together. It was wonderful and we are already planning our next trip. We are making it a point to get away each year to focus on our marriage and each other.

Saying goodbye at the airport. The trip went so fast and it was sad to walk away but the good thing was that Phil was to return home the next weekend. I sure love this man and the life we are making together.