This time of year everyone naturally starts thinking about all the blessings life brings. Life is funny though, things never really turn out the way you plan. And therein lies the beauty, because it's not about what YOU have planned but what has already been planned for you. I have had a few life experiences that have been rough; not what I would have out right chosen willingly but they have turned out to be my greatest strengths and blessings.
I think the single most defining cumulative moment of my youth was growing up without a father in the home. My parents divorced when I was one and I have never really gotten to know my father and even now I have not seen nor spoken to him since my wedding reception. I am okay with this though. I learned that while I may not have an earthly father I do have a Heavenly Father and this epiphany came during my early teens and has helped mold who I am today. I am strong, independent, stubborn and decisive. I am thankful for this experience.
In my brief married existence my greatest trial and blessing are one and the same; my sweet baby boy Camden. Even as I type this and start to reflect upon my firstborn tears are blurring my vision. I cannot describe what it is like to lose a child and I do not wish it on anyone, yet I have gained a stronger testimony of the gospel and more importantly of the Plan of Salvation. Maybe I would not have learned any other way. Not a day goes by that I don't think of him, don't long for him, ache for him. I love that baby so much and yet I only had 3 short days to have him. But that isn't true, I have him forever and that is what matters most. I am so thankful for my son and the brief bittersweet moments we had with him. I know more will come.
What I am thankful for most is my family. Without them what else is there?
9 comments:
Heather,
Camden is the SWEETEST little boy!! I love his lips and his dark hair. He has the most perfect six fingers I have ever seen. :)
You are such a strong person; an inspiration to me and many other people, I am SURE. "Sweet is the peace the gospel brings." Thank you for reminding me of that.
Heather-I am so thankful that I got to grow up with you in my life! You are amazing, and I love you so much.
Camden is so beautiful! I know Heavenly Father has a plan for all of his children, and Camden was SO special all he needed was to come to earth and get a body! Precious boy.
Heather - I just came across your blog and wanted to let you know how impressed I am by you and your little family. Phil was a good friend in high school and I am glad to see that he has found such a wonderful wife. I also read Camden's link and cried and cried. What a sweet dad Phil is and what a wonderful and caring mom you are. The pictures of your family are beautiful. Please tell Phil I said hello.
Kristina Martineau (Milliron)
Wow, you are seriously so amazing and I admire you so much! He is such a cute, sweet, little boy.
You do have him forever. I remember being so impressed with your testimony and strength as you stayed later at my house after a book club and a couple of us were talking about Camden. You are truly amazing and an example to all who know you. I also went to his link and sobbed and sobbed as I read it, it was so sweet and how special to have that minute by minute detailed memory. He looks so sweet but at least, like you said, you know he's yours forever and he's very happy where he is.
Thanks for the reminder to remember my blessings and how important the gospel is in my life.
I can hardly see the keyboard to type. What a precious little boy, his darling little face. How lucky we are to know there is a bigger, brighter plan for our futures. How my heart aches for you when I read your story. You are so lucky to have been entrusted with him!
Heather,
You are an inspiration to me, and have been your whole life! You have been through some very hard hard experiences in your life, and you continue to amaze me with your spirit and your faith. Thank you! The day that you get to hold your Camden in your arms for eternity will be so sweet. He is busy about his work, and he, just like you, is waiting for that day. He has amazing parents. Thanks for reminding me that we are so so blessed to know the Plan of Salvation. I don't know how we would emotionally survive without that knowledge. Love ya Heather!
You really are an amazing person! Life has dealt you a difficult hand thus far, but you come out winning in the end. I love your attitude and perseverance. I am so with you on those trials making you who you are today. My ultimate quote is "Every Person God puts into our lives, Every experience He gives us, Is The PERFECT preparation for the future only HE can see." It has really helped me realize that things happen for a reason. It tugs at my heart that you have had to face so much heartache and loss. I know that Heavenly Father is preparing something wonderful for you. Because from everyone I know...you deserve it the most.
What a wonderful post. I remember getting the e-mail about Camden's arrival while we were in Germany. You have bourne heartache that only parents that have lost a little one know. The picture of you and Phil holding Camden evokes heartache, and love like I have never seen, beautiful family.
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